Today was a rough day for me, personally. It wasn’t a terrible day by any objective measure. Even the fact that I was at the dentist twice (yes, twice) was not a huge downside since everyone there is really nice. It was more that I kept dropping things. I also had a bad inflammation day (probably because I ate fast food at lunch, etc). With the fusion in my neck and spine it seems like sometimes there can be issues with nerves. Limbs going numb, weird pains, etc. Anyway, sometimes my hands just drop stuff. I have techniques I use: carry bags by wrapping the handles around my hands rather than gripping them, hold important stuff either against my body or with two hands, and trying to stay very mindful of my hands when I am carrying things. But today I dropped everything. Starting with the morning in the kitchen. I dropped eggs, bowls of fruit, utensils, a container of olives, and so on. It was extremely frustrating and time consuming to waste food and have these messes to clean up. To an outside observer I just seem clumsy but it feels like I have lost control of my body at times like that. As the day went on it stopped happening. I worry that this will get worse as I age. Fortunately, it doesn’t appear to affect typing or driving, etc. It is more when I am holding something and not 100% mindful of “holding”. My hand will just let go. Arg.

So I somehow managed to overcome that cold! I woke up this morning feeling like crap with a severe headache and some nausea. I took some Tylenol and got to work. At some point the chills went away, my headache was gone (after the Tylenol would have been metabolized), and I felt like eating. Pretty good day overall.

My spouse and child have been really, really sick for weeks and I’ve been skating around the edges, avoiding it. Today I feel like it is here. The cold/flu is here. I am experiencing a sore throat and a chill that no amount of bundling up will fix. Please send chicken soup.

This weekend was pretty productive. assembled more Ikea stuff (mostly not me) assembled some Lego with the boy got Christmas decorating done inside got outside lights up got tire pressure checked and pumped up BEFORE I put used the extension cord for the compressor to hook up outdoor lights purchased a Santa hat for the boy for his daycare stuff that actually fit! In computer news, I am trying to move my entire “personal” computer set up to my VPS. This means Emacs is all on the terminal on the VPS and I’ll only run Syncthing on the VPS and my phone, etc. We’ll see how it goes.

Does this image work? …

Lunch was 3 leftover meatballs (good sized) cooked in a little sauce and fat and covered with parm. I had a heaping tablespoon of cooked rice for science mixed in. Finished with three bites of jerky and some unsalted nuts (keep salted ones around but lunch was salty). Full and feeling OK!

This is simply a blog where I share daily thoughts. CBT Journal? Maybe. No one comes here so… Currently blogging in Emacs using org mode and ox-hugo to export to a Hugo site which is generated and hosted on a Linode VPS. 2018-11-22 - changed the title style a bit

Made it through the night without snacking! Felt full and slept well. My inflammation is lowering as time goes on and I feel pretty “woke” in terms of brain fog. I need all the mental acuity I can get. After work I am taking my son to a friend’s house for a social gathering with a large group. Dinner will not be served (AFAIK) and my son is clamouring for a Happy Meal (which would be extremely convenient given the locations involved). I am not sure what I will do. I am considering buying 2 McDoubles and combining them, throwing away one of the buns. I would normally get the chicken ceaser but I don’t want to count on the lettuce being available and not being riddled with e. Coli.

After careful consideration I have decided to double down on Keto. I have been slipping back in to a standard diet lately, much to my regret. Inflammation is up, making it much harder to sleep and I am generally not feeling great. I would say my weight stabilized once I started sliding back and is in danger of going back up (I gain weight very, very easily). Yesterday was day one, back on it (2018-11-20) so wish me luck. I am not going to bother weighing myself every day. I recently decided weight is not even close to as important to me as how I feel, how my clothes fit, controlling cravings, and other aspects of life. And what happens when I obsess over weight is as I see it go down I am tempted to “reward” with a “treat”. This is addictive behaviour. I am a food addict. Probably a pizza addict. Salty, carby, fatty food. Oh, just typing that makes me want some now. My favorite food? Pizza, bacon sandwhiches, grilled cheese, etc. Anyway, I need to confront this. I have beaten harder things in my time, and cold turkey. Here I go again. I have to think of Owen and the man he sees as his father. He needs a healthy role model.

Getting more of this Hugo blogging system figured out in the 15 minutes I spend on it each day. The theme is OK but I am looking for a better one. Today besides work I managed to get a shelving unit into my office closet. My office is near the kitchen. The shelf will be used to hold less frequently used appliances (vac sealer, slow cooker, electric griddle, etc). Also stuff like paper towels and toilet paper. This will also let me organize all the Christmas gifts (don’t tell the boy). Very tired, need sleep.